I Love my Bible

I love my Bible because for me to be able to just sit, and to have life not be about me, for one moment, is the most peaceful and beautiful thing. 

Today was my day off and I was really tempted to be lazy and sad and not driven to do anything. I was super down with life cos I don’t know where my life is going in 5 or 10 years. But I opened up to a familiar passage, Luke 15, that we gotta read for FCG. And what spoke to me was the Parable of the Lost Son. And how the elder brother was jealous by the end, because everyone was rejoicing the return of the Lost Son. 

Sometimes I am like that. Jealous. Too infatuated by my own thoughts and expectations and judgements that I am unable to join in the rejoicing. There is so much happening around us to rejoice for. But we miss out because our vision of our own lives is too big.

I wanna learn to be glad for others.  Rejoice because others are doing well. 

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Found some hidden gems on the internet today

Stumbled across this treasure trove of lovely Christian songs. 
The Good Christian Music Blog 

Where has it been my whole life?! I durno but I really been sleeping on this one. Here are two of my favourites so far after perusing through the site (these will link you to youtube links).
Josh White – Enclosed By You
Strahan – Deliverance

Hope y’all enjoy!

Consistency

I struggle with consistency. Too willingly I’ll start things with ambition and enthusiasm, but then be unable to finish them or unprepared to persevere through the hardships that follow. Even small things, this blog, waking up on time, being punctual. And then there are the big responsibilities too. Being home for dinner, personal devotions. Lord, teach me to commit in all that I do.

I disappear a lot. Close myself off from the world. And slowly, this starts to take a toll on the relationships I have. I commit myself today to rekindling old relationships. Repenting humbly to those I’ve failed. I’ve let down a lot of people in my past. Not doing things I’ve said I’ll do. Not turning up to events I click attending to. I just pray God to teach me lessons in discipline. Lessons in persistence. Lessons in love. Eugene’s pastoral note for March 16th speaks on spiritual training. This is my training for this year. To be available, consistent, reliable.

– Learn to say no to things you cannot give 100% to.
– Wake up on time to prevent depression.
– Commit to prayerful dependence and patience and planning! Plan more before diving into things!
– Find out what’s happening in other’s lives! So I can learn how to understand them, love them, be praying unceasingly for them.

This is an account and hopefully the first of many of my training in godliness this year.

“Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress. Watch your life and your doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.”
1 Timothy 4:15-16

Re-examining Faith

In the Bible, there are such great tales of conflict, setbacks and dire moments for our heroes. But in the face of every persecution, through every burning furnace we are thrown into, what remains is that God’s name is always exalted in the craziest ways. Always!

There’s so many moments of futility, moments where I cannot say that I would have remained faithful: Daniel and his friends, having their lives threatened. David being hunted for years, by a psychotic king. Times where I feel so much hopelessness for these guys, but simply because they were faithful, God found ways to magnify his name, to add numbers to his kingdom. In a way, these guys had nothing going for them, but because they had God, they had everything. Faith is all these guys had! And time and time again, that is all God asks from us. God does all the heavy lifting! He will find a way to bring about victory, he will find a way to lift up the name of Christ, above all other names. And in the face of trial and suffering it is so difficult to understand how God will do these things, but to exercise faith is the most powerful thing we can do in these times, for our faith is what will stand out, what people will remember, when God delivers; And the lives of many will be saved, simply because of faith.

Reflection Time with Papa S

Reading through my boy Isaiah yesterday

“See how the faithful city has become a prostitute!
She once was full of justice, righteousness used to dwell in her – but now murderers!”

A warning to the 21st Century Christian. Even those who were once faithful and full of righteousness, can fall victim to the world. Even we, once wide-eyed, ambitious, rich toward God, can become lost, too accepting of the brokenness around us, that we become part of it. Surrounded by a world that worships other gods, I have to ask; when they offer you to follow their gods, will you use that opportunity to stand out and show them the God you worship? Or will we forsake our God for a temporary inclusion with society, deny him and give the world what it wants, rather than what it needs.

Further warnings (still in Isaiah 1)

“The multitude of your sacrifices-
what are they to me?” says the Lord.

Stop bringing meaningless offerings!
Your incense is detestable to me.

Your New Moon feasts and your
appointed festivals
I hate with all my being.
They have become a burden to me;
I am weary of bearing them.
When you spread out your hands in prayer,
I hide my eyes from you;
even when you offer many prayers,
I am not listening.

God is sick of our empty prayers! He is tired of our hands which work but whose hearts remain unchanged. Doing Christian things does not make us Christian, for God will not look at our works when we arrive at the pearly gates, it is the heart that he truly wants.

Some More Musings

So yesterday I was doing some stuff at the bank, then I get asked for my photo and an interview for some Korean magazine. And I was like coolies this is exciting. So I was sat down and was asked all these serious questions about marriage and stuff. And then they asked me how would you go about solving conflict in a relationship. And I was like, well the couple has to talk obviously. And you really gotta get to the root of the problem, otherwise it will definitely resurface and manifest itself in other ways, perhaps even stronger than before. And this really got me thinking about when Jesus talks about an impure spirit leaving a person. All is well and good, but that spirit may go and find seven other spirits more wicked than itself and return to the place it once dwelt. So yes we really do need to yank out our problems out by the root, but I reckon that that’s not enough, we also really need to fill it’s place with something good. Let a good seed work and grow in it’s place, leaving no room for that problem to reignite.

And so like sometimes I get really severely depressed right. And sometimes I can never figure out what that root of the problem is. Am I not working hard enough? Are my expectations for myself too high? And I’ve settled with the idea that maybe for the rest of my days, I will never be able to identify the immediate cause of my afflictions. Maybe I seek appreciation and support from my parents too hard. Perhaps it stems from the guilt of letting people down. And I can go on and on, plucking away at all these smaller roots, but I realize that humanity’s biggest issue, the biggest root of our problems, has always been our relationship with God. And too often we fail to realize this, and we discredit the cause of our problems to something else. But I understand now that maybe God will never relinquish me from these cycles of depression. Maybe I will never become that super manly man I’ve always aspired to be. But whatever happens, I will always continue to seek more and more an intimacy with my Creator, for that has always been the biggest issue, and it would be good on the day Jesus returns, that he finds us still seeking, and running hard. Whether I get the girl, whether I get my dream job, whether I become the super Christian guy of my ambitions, whether I ever finally reach my own destinations or not. I am happy to keep running and searching. And so run hard I will!

A to the men.